His Last Breath

I bought a large rubber tote yesterday. I have been looking at Chad's clothes sitting in a pile on the bench in our room for the last month. I know he's never going to wear his clothes again. It's a truth that is really hard to fathom, but it's a truth nonetheless. He's gone. He …

I Need To Buy An Air Popper

I tried to make popcorn on the stove last evening. I burned most of it. My husband always made me popcorn on the stove. It's my favorite evening snack. We don't own a microwave and I don't want the extras that are in microwave popcorn bags anyway. He didn't even like to eat popcorn. He …

A Father’s Daughter

My grandmother wore Shalimar perfume. I still have a small vial in my medicine cabinet that I don't wear, but it was here when we moved in and I have kept it as is. I have smelled that perfume at random times while living in this house. Not just a random whiff, but a powerful …

No Goodbye

My husband died. It's been almost three weeks. One moment he was talking to me, reasoning with me, seeing me. I watched him walk down the hallway towards our living room. Not knowing it would be the last time that I would speak to him. See his legs in motion. Watch him breathe. I didn't …